It's Weird Up There

You know it's the silly season when media reports - in the United States, where I live, anyway - are filled with reports about a man dressing in exposed women's underwear while flying, a college student with trousers hanging below his waist being taken into custody and escorted off a plane, and the Internet buzzing about a pilot who inadvertently complained into a radio frequency about the unattractiveness of female flight attendants and preponderence of gays at his airline.

Is there nothing better to talk about? Apparently not, at least not in the slow old summertime.

Critics charge - they're always charging something, have you noticed? - that the aforementioend pilot, an employee of Southwest Airlines, was inappropriate in his choice of comments. No doubt he was, though he didn't know anyone except his co-pilot was listening to remarks made in the cockpit that were in fact disseminated through parts of the U.S. aviation communications system. Said critics are now demanding the pilot undergo sensitivity training. Good luck with that. The opinions, which veer on the knuckle-dragging side, are nonetheless this fellow's personal opinions. As long as they don't interfere with safe and efficient operation of an aircraft, it's hard to image they constitute a truly serious offense.

The guy who flew in women's undies? A 65-year-old white guy with white hair, photographed on a smart phone in purple halter and bare midrift, a choker, long black stockings and tight purple underwear. He told the San Francisco Chronicle that he flies like this a lot, doesn't mean to offend anyone and does it for fun. He is apparently an elite level frequent flier on US Airways and describes himself as a business consultant.

As it happens, US Airways is the same airline that tossed the college student, an African American football player, off a flight before take-off after he allegedly refused to hitch up his pants when the flight crew asked him to, and then - in the airline's account - grew belligerent. The student says, no, he was cooperative and was sitting in his seat when approached and his underwear - described as skintight by several fellow passengers - couldn't be seen. The NAACP has gotten involved, claiming this is a clear case of racial profiling. The young man has a lawyer. In America, where racial animus has been boiling over for generations, playing the race card is always a possibility, as is litigation.

US Air compounds its public relations and customer relations problem by saying the airline has no dress code; people are free to fly as long as their private parts are concealed, according to the Phoenix-based carrier.

That still leaves a lot of territory for debate and disagreement. In the usual venting and rage-o-rama, common sense, whether by airline or passengers, seems to have gone missing. Yet, having some regard for the sensitivites of others, whether enforced by rule or not, doesn't seem like such a bad idea. Is keeping one's snarky opinions of fellow employees to oneself really that hard? How about covering up one's body? Hard? Really hard? We don't have to start issing burkas for passengers to put on in transit, just exercise a minimum amount of courtesy.

And so the battle rages, along with ongoing media coverage - and media commentary, like this post. And just think, it's only June. Wait till the really slow news months roll around. July and August should be doozies.

Pillow-and Blanket-Talk

Which new airline fee will be the proverbial camel that breaks the weary air traveler's back? Maybe none of them; travelers seem to be getting used to paying extra for snacks, hot meals, legroom, windowand aisle seats, checked luggage, and other things not included in the price of basic airfare.

American Airlines will shortly become the latest carrier to charge extra in economy class for a pillow and blanket - at least on flights over two hours within North America, the Caribbean and Central America. The blanket and pillow will be packaged together and cost $8 USD as of May 1 for those who want a little extra comfort. Fellow U.S. carriers JetBlue Airways and US Airways already charge for pillows and blankets; both of those airlines charge $7 USD.

Might as well get used to it. It's annoying, but this is the brave new world of air travel - especially so on U.S. domestic flights. Airlines are starved for revenue, thanks to the Great Recession, security scares and security costs and the volatile price of jet fuel. The airlines have tried to raise fares, but consumer push-back has kept those raises at minimal levels - as compared to, say, the soaring cost of private health care in the United States, where patients have little choice but to pay up. Compared to that, the airline add-ons are small stuff.

Still, one does wish air fares - once all-inclusive or nearly so - were all-inclusive again. It's cleaner, faster, clearer, compared to the maze of fees, taxes, surcharges and add-ons that passengers pay now. But until airlines can return to profit on a consistent basis - and until passengers accept at least modest airfare hikes - the nickle and diming will continue.

Green Shoots of Recovery?

After housing and automobile manufacturing, travel has been hit about as hard as any industry in America by the Great Recession. Airlines in particular are hurting, hammered by weak consumer demand, volatile oil prices and fears of a surge of swine flu come fall.

The most recent financial results, taken from the second quarter of 2009, show what might be - in the current phrase - the green shoots of recovery. That is to say some airlines actually made money in the generally dismal second quarter; not many, and they didn't make much, but any profit is cause for cautious optimism at this point.

Two of the six U.S. majors made money: US Airways, with a modest $58 million profit, and discount leader Southwest Airlines, with just a nudge more: $59 million. There were also money-makers among the smaller U.S. carriers: Alaska Airlines made $29.1 million, JetBlue Airways recorded a profit of $76 million and AirTran eked out a $78.4 million profit.

True, these gains were more than outweighed by losses at four of the six U.S. majors: Minus $213 million at Continental Airways, $257 million in losses at Delta Air Lines, a whopping $323 million shortfall at chronically ill United Airlines and an even more whopping $390 million loss at American Airlines, which announced nearly simultaneously that it will raise fees for checking bags for most economy class fliers on domestic routes.

Starting Aug. 14, travelers on American will pay $20 for the first checked bag, up from $15, and $30 for their second checked bag, up from $25. First-class, business-class, full-fare economy and frequent flier club members won't be charged. This fee rise is no coincidence, as loss-making airlines are finding adds-ons like these to be reliable revenue streams at a time when carriers can't raise fares as much as they'd like to for fear of further alienating customers.

What to make of this decidedly mixed-bag of financial results? Just this: Airlines have a long way to go to return to solid profits, but a start, however tentative, has been made. Air travelers have got to hope a recovery sets in and quickly accelerates, so airlines have money to restore slashed frequencies and routes, buy new aircraft and go back to bigger planes. Until they do, fewer, more crowded planes, fewer non-stop flights and ever-tinier aircraft with worrisome safety records will continue to be the new normal, with all the discomfort that implies for travelers.