Cell Phone Flap

The United States is working itself into a lather - something Americans so enjoy doing - over this week's proposal by the National Transportation Safety Board to ban all mobile phone use by drivers of cars. Some of the nation's 50 states already ban handheld devices. But the proposal by the NTSB (www.ntsb.gov), a branch of the oft-reviled federal government, would ban hands-free devices, too.

It's America's Outrage du Jour.

This proposal will fail, for two reasons: First, it makes too much sense. Logic suggests that texting, talking or e-mailing from behind the wheel of a two-ton moving vehicle might be a tad dangerous. But logic has nothing to do with it, which brings us to the second reason for imminent failure: It would be seen as infringing on the individual rights of Americans, among the most individualistic people on earth. Some of my countrymen would rather be dead than allow Big Gov'mint to tell them what to do, even if it would serve the greater public good. And so, with the continuing explosion of smart-phone use by drivers, some soon will be.

But why sweat the small stuff? There is already push-back by phone-makers, states-righters, and don't tread on me types, and predictions are being made that any laws passed will be laws not enforced.

This is the time of year when travel-watchers predict what the coming holiday will be like. The American Automobile Association (www.aa.com) produces one of the most closely followed forecasts. This holiday season, encompassing Christmas and New Year's Eve and running from Dec. 23, 2011 to Jan. 3, 2012, will see 91.9 million Americans travel more than 50 miles, predicts the AAA. Some 83.3 million of them will drive, driven to their cars by rising air fares, crowded airports and airplanes, famously limited U.S. train service and slightly less expensive gasoline.

Think just how good it will be to have a teenage driver drinking and driving on New Year's Eve and texting something along the lines of "U cool? I had awesome cupcakes at grandma's'' while sharing the road with you.

Hold that thought, and Happy New Year.

The Shape of Things to Come

Are you ready for some air rage? How about ground rage?

Both are likely to intensify in the years ahead, thanks in large part to the proliferation of mobile personal electronic devices and the desire of travelers to use them anytime, anywhere - including commercial flights.

This thought suggested to me when I read today about a 68-year man who slugged a teenage boy who refused to turn off his iPhone on a Southwest Airlines flight; the airline had announced the time to turn off all electronic devices had arrived, just as the aircraft prepared to takeoff from Las Vegas. After the plane landed, in Boise, the slugger was arrested for resorting to violence and allegedly leaving a mark on the slugee. He facesa maximum sentence of six months in jail and a fine up to $1,000 USD.

This is exactly the type of thing many of us - led by flight attendants, who will inevitably have to adjudicate when someone wants to use a personal cell phone in flight and someone else wants to read or sleep - have been afraid of. The problem is only becoming more fraught as the number of devices grows and traditional reluctance to intrude on the privacy of others erodes under the need for constant stimulus and pressure to keep working and stay in touch with home and office.

Regardless of what laws eventually govern the use of personal devices, every airline - and every travel provider such as railroad lines and subways - has got to set policies for when such use is and isn't acceptable. And then stick to those policies.

The alternative is more tension, more blackguard oaths and maybe even more violence, both between passengers and between passengers and staff. Let's try to get this right now, while ground-rules are still being set.

Hooker for the Barbarians

LISBON - I have been in cell hell many times, when mobile phone yakkers felt secure enough to share information about their lives with whomever was around, whenever the mood struck them. This happened most recently on the otherwise estimable 15 euro hop- on, hop-off big bus tour that takes people around Lisbon. There is nothing more touristy but it gives you the lay of the land in a new place - then you can go back to places you liked.

Anyway, imagine you are inadvertently overhearing hearing this in the middle of an otherwise interesting city tour:

`Hello, Mary, hello, hello. Can I ring you right back? Hello.

`So, you went to the game? How was it? A draw. Well, that is good, iddnt it? I mean, that way nobody wins and nobody loses, everybody happy.

`You will want to see Thomas play next time his team are in town. You know, he has got a new girlfriend, and it must be serious, she is coming over to live with him. Yes, he is playing hooker for the Barbarians. They will be in town on the 5th.

`Thank you, Mary, thank you. Hello? Oh, you are breaking up. Ring you back, luv.´

I believe hooker is a position in rugby, is it not? Of course, in some cultures, hooker for the barbarians has a different connotation, though it may still be classified as a sport.